"

I try to act cool
pretend like I can’t feel
smilin’ like a fool
can’t believe she’s real

her eyes
her cute little nose
her lips and her smile
it felt so good to get lost for a while

we laughed together
we cried together
we felt together
we fuckin lived together

together we lived
but I was scared didn’t have enough to give
but thought no one cared

so I tried to

move on
play it off almost forgot about it and for that i hate myself
what am I doing
why am I letting her slip
who is she seeing
fuck
why lately, she hasn’t been the same
why do all our dreams seem to fade away
need to get my shit together
want us to last forever

so I

I called her
I met her
I talked and talked and kept talking
just kept saying shit, totally ignoring her
til’ she grabbed me
then I calmed down
and now I could see
how much I was missing her warmth

Was happy for the moment, thought everything was fine, I explained myself, and now she’s back

She slowly let go of me and it hit me as she whispered

“I don’t love you anymore”

And i realised, i was late. Been around my homies too much, shouldn’t have played it cool, should have shown my feelings, should have done this and that. Why am i the type of person who always talks that “should have”, “could have”, “would have” stuff. Please tell me Self, why are you like this. You’re ruining my life, i fucking hate you. Piece of shi-

“It’s over.”

No!

This catastrophe might break me but at the end of the tunnel I won’t be empty.

There’s light in these eyes you could only see when you’ve died. You can’t see it, that’s why you’re gone. I should have seen this shit all along. It took me to come back as another person to write this song. But it’s all gone now the pain I’m free. I’m back in love but it’s only with me.

"

officialcommanderlexa:

officialcommanderlexa:

i always laugh whenever we have to centrifuge bacteria because imagine you’re just chilling in some broth with your buds and then someone comes along and puts you in a tube and spins you at fucking 14,000 rpm

image

glyndarling:

hazeldomain:

writedreamlie:

lizardywizard:

juliedillon:

note to self: just because someone did the thing you were thinking about doing, and did it way better than you could ever hope to do, doesn’t mean it would be stupid or pointless to go ahead and try to still do the thing anyway. 

Also, when it comes to creative things? There really is no “better”.

Sure, someone might be more technically accomplished than you - you might not be able to colour as nicely or craft a sentence that rings as poetically - but art is only really secondarily about that. It’s firstmost about what you, uniquely, have to express, and how the precise way you express it might be what others need to relate to it - even if it’s less flashy, less “beautiful”, and gets fewer notes.

I promise you this: there are obscure fanfics with only a handful of notes that are the read-and-re-read favourites of someone too anxious to comment. There are drawings done by 14-year-olds in poorly-blended markers that are someone’s favourite because they spoke to something that nothing else did. There are covers of songs where your voice cracks and you cringe every time you hear it but someone thinks the way it cracked just at that moment added beauty to the song. There are angsty three-line poems you wrote at 4am that someone once called “pretentious emo trash” that are loved by someone else going through the same thing as you.

And I guarantee you, there is something unique about your art. Even if you’re “saying something someone else has said”. Even if you’re the thousandth person to take on the subject. Even if you feel like you’re not at all unique. You’re bound to express something, however subtle, that didn’t exist until then.

Art is about connection. And the more you create, the more chance you have of finding other people who experience the world the way you do.

“But the one thing that you have that nobody else has is you. Your voice, your mind, your story, your vision. So write and draw and build and play and dance and live as only you can.“ via @neil-gaiman

image

The “two cakes” theory of content production. 

It was only yesterday that I was lamenting thing I no longer felt allowed to do because someone had done similar.   I ought to read this post daily.  Maybe twice daily.

The car is on fire, and there’s no driver at the wheel
And the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides
And a dark wind blows

The government is corrupt
And we’re on so many drugs
With the radio on and the curtains drawn

We’re trapped in the belly of this horrible machine
And the machine is bleeding to death

The sun has fallen down
And the billboards are all leering
And the flags are all dead at the top of their poles

It went like this:

The buildings tumbled in on themselves
Mothers clutching babies
Picked through the rubble
And pulled out their hair

The skyline was beautiful on fire
All twisted metal stretching upwards
Everything washed in a thin orange haze

I said, “Kiss me, you’re beautiful -
These are truly the last days”

You grabbed my hand
And we fell into it
Like a daydream
Or a fever

We woke up one morning and fell a little further down
For sure it’s the valley of death

I open up my wallet
And it’s full of blood

“I’ve had a lot of relationships in my time, platonic or otherwise, but the ones I think about most are those that never quite made it to term.

The dashing first date who didn’t call you back.

The lady on the train you had that amazing conversation with but never saw again.

The cool neighbor kid you met the first time a week before he moved away.

I guess I’m just haunted by all that potential energy.

One moment, the universe presents you with this amazing opportunity for new possibilities…

… And then…”

"Naming is a foreshadowing of mourning because it seems to me that every case of naming involves announcing a death to come in the surviving of a ghost, the longevity of a name that survives whoever carries that name."
- Derrida, The Animal That Therefor I Am. (via barrrrrrs)
"Old things have strange hungers."
-

Catherynne M. Valente, from The Girl Who Circumnavigated Fairyland in a Ship of Her Own Making

(via thewinedarksea)

“As above, so below, as within, so without, as the universe, so the soul…”